Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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