the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
