The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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