I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Ladies don't puke and tell
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
His nipple licking is glorious
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