these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
