Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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