how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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