i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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