I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
