everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
