He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
