I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
