That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
