Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
