Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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