Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
