i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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