Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Let's get the cat blown out
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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