Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
