mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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