no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
