Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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