There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
