He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
