Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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