CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize