I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
