Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
