You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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