my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
we made out on top of his cat.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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