The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
