We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
