i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
