I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
