i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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