He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
