I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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