the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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