Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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