She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
