i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
