my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
