I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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