He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
