Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize