lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize