i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
