You can't special order awesome
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
