Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
