I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
