Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
