marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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