with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
